Wednesday, November 4, 2009

As a possibility

My very dear gentlemen,
I cannot express to you the sorrow I would feel upon hearing you were ever in the presence of a young lady, of whom you could say-- "She speaks poniards,and every word stabs." Unless you deserve these poniards, or they are Shakespeare and were found on this very blog (in which case I might rejoice...so sorry).

So, let's say she's being really witty, cruel, and correct. For insistence, we'll say she's talking about how the only thing you ever do is eat! Maybe that wouldn't be so bad, she continues, but you don't even seem to care what you're eating. You wouldn't know if it were healthy or slowly killing you. So long as you're eating, you don't care, heck! ya might as well be eating cow guts. You wouldn't notice anyway, that's how little you ever notice anything. Ok, we now see that this female isn't really thinking about your eating habits, it's how you never pay attention or notice anything. She's really going now, and you can see that this may last an eternity. So, gently touch her arm, or quietly say her name, to get her
attention. Once she's stopped talking, say simply and calmly, looking directly in her eyes ( If you can't help laughing when you look in her eyes, you may want to skip that. ), say "Here's a dish I love not! I cannot endure my lady tongue."

The battle is won! For once, she is at a loss for something to say. In all fairness to our lady, she's really not thinking about food, and therefore not thinking about retorts to food disses. But! you have stumped her, she may now wander petulantly away, or start another argument, and I'm sorry if she does, but at least you now have something to say to constant food nagging.


I forgot Carina and myself in my list of quotes last night, which is slightly ironic, since she said I should still give people their own quotes and I 'm the one writing all this stuff, so without further ado!

Carina/Rachel--"What is this quintessence of dust?"

2 comments:

Unknown said...

That was positively hilarious! now you need to come up with one for the girls! hahaha

Rachelbugalita said...

Oh, I will!!! =D
Thanks for reading cassie!!